Many of us make New Year’s resolutions about how we can improve ourselves in the coming year. Starting off the year with a clean slate gives us the opportunity to eat better, exercise more, study harder, etc. What do you suppose Kitty might decide if left to her own devices to come up with her own New Year’s resolutions for cats?
Of course, Kitty’s resolutions would be entirely different than the New Year’s resolutions we wish she would make. Wouldn’t it be nice to know she was making the effort to do more of what we wished? Because cats are the way they are, she would probably be indifferent to those resolutions we wish for her to make. Does she even know or care that a year has passed? She would likely remind us that cat years are different from human years, anyway. So, first to some resolutions she might make for herself:
- 1.Catch That Darn Red Dot. There she is in her brand new Armarkat condo pondering how many hours she spent last year in hot pursuit of that laser dot. It moves so fast and erratically! Maybe, with increased determination in the new year, this will finally be the year she captures it.
- 2.Do More Laundry. As everyone knows, cats love to lie on freshly washed clothing. What a happy place it is to sit atop the warm, freshly washed pile. So, to get more joy, she promises to find just the right clothes to make her the happiest.
- 3.Destroy the Vacuum Monster. Every time that dreaded creature comes out, it wreaks more havoc in the house. It is so loud and annoying as it roams the entire place huffing and puffing away. Is this is the year she will finally take it down?
- 4.Kick the Catnip Habit. Just like humans, cats keep swearing to give up their vices. But as soon as that new Christmas catnip toy comes out, it is too much fun, so that old habit just keeps coming back. On second thought, nobody ever said this was dangerous. So, scratch that resolution and let’s party!
- 5.Figure out How to get Second Breakfast. Since cats are known to be master manipulators of their gullible humans, this shouldn’t be too hard. That starving look, a few plaintive meows, and that elusive second breakfast is in the bag.
- 6.Try Tiny Box Living. Since some humans are interested in living with less possessions and leaving less of a footprint, why shouldn’t cats attempt the same? To jump on this bandwagon, cats might try fitting themselves into progressively smaller boxes. Though this resolution takes “If it fits, I sits” to a whole new level, we still prefer Armarkat pet beds for the long haul, Finally, if we had our druthers, here are some resolutions we might want Kitty to make:
1.Snuggle up with her human more, especially on gloomy days.
2.Avoid the urge to knock things off the table. OK, at least the breakable things!
3.Realize that the vet is there for a reason, and it’s actually not to hurt us cats.
4.Remember that the humans need sleep, too. (Don’t forget they sleep at night.)
5.Take more naps when feeling crabby. Wake up happy, not irritable!
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